I am not a big fan of roses. They seem to die so quickly and there are the thorns to contend with. So, I was a little surprised when my husband bought me a miniature rose bush for Valentine’s Day this year. It was a tiny potted rose plant with a single bloom on it. Two days after receiving the rose, it began to die…rapidly. This rose was in serious need of some TLC. I love gardening and growing things, so I immediately re-potted the plant.

It was so root bound and had been in a pot with no drainage which meant root rot may have already set in. I put it in a larger pot with fresh, fertile soil, watered it, moved it into the sun, and prayed for it. That may seem silly to pray for a plant, but God does care about the things we care about. Luke 12:7 says that He knows the number of hairs we have. Why would He even care about something so little as a hair? Ask a balding man how much he cares about each of his hairs. Matthew 6:26 explains how He feeds even the lowly sparrow. So yes, He cares about little things. They are all His creation. The roots of this plant had nowhere to go. They needed to go deeper. They needed fresh, life-giving soil.

A few days after the “transplant”, the rose not only showed signs of surviving, but thriving. Two weeks after Valentine’s Day, the plant bloomed a tiny, intricate rose. It continues to grow and just yesterday I had to move it to an even bigger pot. That one bloom just began to drop its leaves a few days ago and already has new buds eager to burst forth with their fragrant beauty. That one bloom lasted over two months. Why? How?

As I sat on the back lanai this morning listening to the sweet sound of rain, I stared at that fading bloom. Then God spoke to me. That bloom remained attached to the vine and thrived. Cut roses don’t last too long. Why? Because they are no longer attached to the vine; their source of food and strength.  John 15:5 “I am the vine; you are the branches. If you remain in me and I in you, you will bear much fruit; apart from me you can do nothing.”

The last few months I have been like a cut rose. I felt myself fading into the darkness of pain and hopelessness. Most people do not see my pain as it is not visible to the eye like a cast on a broken arm. My husband is probably the only person that can see the weariness in my eyes. Why? Because he knows me better than any other person. I can be my weakest in the strength of Mark’s arms. God sees the weariness of my soul for He created it and knows me in a way no human ever will. My husband has prayed for me every day for this pain (TN1/TN2) to leave my body. He knows and trusts that God can heal me of this excruciating pain. Mark knows that God can restore my hope, joy, and faith. Mark has been like a gardener for my soul leading me to “The Vine”. When my proverbial petals start to turn black and fall, Mark is there reminding me of God’s promises and gives me the rich soil of his own love to keep me turning to God.

This journey to find the cause and cure for this pain has been long, but not as long as other’s struggles. This journey has seen me wilt and dry up with despair. This journey has heard me question God’s love for me. The rose doesn’t blame God for its wilting. The rose takes what it is given, dirt, water, and sunlight, and turns it all into beauty. The rose can not change its circumstances or where it has been planted, but it will endure and prevail with fertile soil, water, and sunlight. And so can I if I remain on the vine of Jesus Christ.

All too often, at least for me, when trouble comes, I run. We pray and expect God to immediately answer our prayer just the way we want. When He doesn’t, we detach. We feel unloved and begin a slow and dangerous move away from the vine. Why do we think we can do this on our own? Yes, it hurts to grow deeper. We are forced to break through hard soil to find the nutrition we need. We have to endure the winds and rains of life forgetting that He is right beside us trying to give us living water and strengthen our roots. We get so caught up in the pain, we forget that it is temporary.

Those last seven words of John 15:5 states that apart from HIM I can do nothing. Oh, I can complain. I can forget all that He has done for me. I can lose hope and a lot of other things. But, I cannot do anything of worth. Today, I cling to the vine even if it has thorns. I cling to the vine as winds of pain try to blow me away. I cling to the vine through the power of the prayers of my husband and friends. I cling to the vine for that is where life; abundant life is. I may not always be as fragrant and glorious as the rose, but I will remain in The Vine.

In many ways we are like that rose. We struggle to grow. We wilt at times. The beauty God draped us in fails to remain beautiful. The rose has no control over its destiny. It cannot uproot itself and move to fertile soil. It cannot prune back the dead branches that only hinder its growth. It cannot water itself or move itself into the light. WE CAN!  I can choose to stay on the road to spiritual death or I can do something about it. It really is my choice. Today, I choose to bloom. I choose to burst forth from the darkness of this dirty world and show the amazing beauty that God knitted into my very soul. I can choose to be like a Night Blooming Cereus and shine even in the darkness of pain and despair. What do you choose?